Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Edifying Dinner Conversation: A Days Worth of Throw Up

I can think of no other way to do this than to put it in bullet form. Yesterday was the first day of school and this is what we discussed at our dinner table last night.

* I made Dani take her (new) multiple vitamin at 7:10 AM while she was eating her breakfast and drinking a small glass of orange juice. She quietly disappeared to my bathroom and I found her there a few minutes later exiting the toilet area. She said the famous words "Mom, I just threw up". I was thinking she was especially nervous and excited about the first day of school and barked at her for getting carried away until it dawned on me it must have been the vitamin. Vomit Story #1

* Dani shared what occurred in one of the 6th grade classrooms around 1:00 PM. A boy threw up in a forward facing direction and it landed in a little girl's pony tail. Dani was especially offended that the school nurse only rinsed the girl's pony out with water, not a full shampoo and conditioning cleaning. I assume the boy went home. Vomit story #2

*Sarah pipes up next. "Well, a little girl in my class threw up 5 times at home this morning (thank you considerate mother) and then she threw up 5 more times during lunch/recess". I'm screaming this whole time, wondering if this child came near to Sarah during the day. Sarah reassured me "no, not really". Do you think considerate mother was surprised to receive a phone call from the school nurse? Duh. Vomit Story # 3.

*James and Dave who just arrived home from football practice shared precious information about the boys vomiting all over the football field and in the near by bushes. The Italian lunch, high heat and "gassers" were getting to them. Joy. Vomit Story #4

*Hannah, not wanting to be left out, told us about a freshman last year who was walking down a sidewalk in between classes, leaned over a bush and lost it. Just cuz. Vomit Story #5

My friend Stacey and I laughed til we cried last night as I was relaying all of this information to her. It really is unbelievable that all of this occurred in one day, so close to home.

I sent the kids off today, clean, healthy, well fed and happy, we'll see how they come home. Hopefully not puking.

The dinner converstaion can only improve from here. No?

14 comments:

anita said...

This is too funny. I would laugh out loud but my arch nemesis (a house fly) would dart right in my open mouth. Then I would have to throw up.

It's getting hot and muggy here- I hope no one gets sick at soccer practice and adds a Wisconsin chapter to the puking stories.

Janet said...

Anita, do let me know if there are any added chapters. :)

Janice, a sis said...

gross

Donna Boucher said...

I like all the names for throw up.

They are very funny, don't you think?

hurl
barf
blow chunks
up chuck

Janet said...

ralph

Anonymous said...

the preppy handbook was full of expressions for throw up

anita said...

No regurgitations at soccer practice. Just lots of hot, sweaty, whiny teens.

Anonymous said...

Now you know why I never had a Jimmy...I'd also have to have a Ralph....Puke! LOL at your stories today. Sister Sue

Diana said...

FYI.. boys brag about throwing up on the sports field- it's a real sign of manliness. The coach doesn't think you got a hard enough workout until someone barfs (according to Jordan).

hannah said...

Ummm well, when it is track season like at least 3 guys throw up every day... and they dont even walk that far away. It's so GROSS!

dmk32 said...

OH MY WORD...I'm glad my eldest daughter wasn't reading over my shoulder...she has a serious fear of all things barf related! But I'm glad to know we're not the only family who has less than refined dinner conversation!

My favorite term for barfing is "yack".

And don't get me started on the mom who sent her daughter to school! That is just WRONG on so many levels.

Thanks for the laugh, Janet!

Denise

Janet said...

Happy to report that no one is tossing their cookies.....yet.

Mom of Five said...

"Driving the porcelain bus" might be appropriate for those of you who send them off to school.

I'm not a sister but do have 5 kids and live in AZ!

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